Why is Agreeability seen as a “Weakness”?

In simple layman’s terms, agreeability means a person’s ability to put others needs before their own. People who are agreeable are considered more considerate, helpful, compromising, understanding and extremely adaptive. They value relationships above their personal preferences and are keen on ensuring everyone else around them are happy. Usually, it can be seen as a strength or a weakness depending on the situation and on other factors associated with the situation. But most often, it is always seen as a weakness. Let’s understand how and why agreeability is perceived in a negative way, in this particular blog.

Agreeableness as a personality trait. 

Most people who are agreeable in nature, try their best to avoid conflict and maintain peace and harmony. They thrive in a calm and stable environment. They are more likely to be empathetic and they often find pleasure in helping others even if it takes a slight toll on them. They are liked by most people and go out of their way to maintain this nature. They are commonly described as friendly, polite, kind and co-operative. But, also remember, there’s a fine line between being genuinely agreeable and agreeing just to avoid any discomfort. 

How individualistic mannerisms are more favored than being agreeable?

On the contrary, individuals who score low on the agreeableness factor are perceived as valuing their own personal interests above that of others. This may not necessarily be a negative trait. Society today is growing profoundly and believes that personal preference is of utmost priority in order to function as a whole. Individuals who are able to place their opinions in front of others, take a stance or have the ability to disagree with others have been seen as ones who are courageous, honest and creative. Therefore, they seem more attractive as compared to those who aren’t able to stand up and put forth their opinion. Especially at work places this quality is highly valued as it is believed that having this characteristic adds creativity, innovation and transformation within the organization and reduces group think. When individuals are highly agreeable then they are seen as incapable of being honest therefore, holding back their opinions which in turn damages the productivity of the organization. 

Is agreeability also a positive and beneficial personality trait?

Agreeability has its positive side as well. Being agreeable, also makes one flexible and accommodating which is beneficial when working as a team or in a group. Even though agreeability is seen as something that is very easy to do, on the contrary, being agreeable and agreeing to something also takes effort. One has to put aside one's opinion and personal thoughts and beliefs and accept someone else's opinion. Being agreeable also makes a person seem trustworthy as they are able to respect your thought process and put aside their personal interest for your comfort. This also makes them more affectionate, caring, understanding and altruistic. These qualities are always preferred by others as everyone wants to be treated in a nice way. 

Is agreeableness a weakness then?

Agreeability in itself cannot be considered a weakness as the qualities a person high on agreeableness possesses are crucial and favourable. But agreeableness could become a weakness if one’s intentions are in the right place. If one’s intention is to avoid conflict, reduce work, people please, reduce discomfort them agreeability could be seen as a weakness. But if it’s genuine and directed towards the betterment of oneself and others then

this can be a strength and could be used to benefit you and as well as the environment around you.

Disclaimer: This blog post is meant for awareness/entertainment purposes only. It is not medical advice and one must refrain from self-diagnosing. It is in no way a substitute for therapy with a mental health professional and it is not meant to be clinical. To consult with a psychotherapist on our team, you can contact us on fettle.counselling@gmail.com.